The Adventures of Pixel City
Road Trip Music Bitterness

Road Trip Music Bitterness

Radio Disney.

Because Radio Disney.

Back in March, when I was finally granted one actual week of vacation out of my 4 possible weeks, it just so happened that it was on the same week as my kids Spring Break from school and the week after my parents were just coming home from Mongolia to their home base of Utah.  Since we hadn’t seen my parents for a year and a half, except through the miracle of this…

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The Mountainous Barriers of Friday Giftures

The Mountainous Barriers of Friday Giftures

Many claim that the mountains are majestic, and beautiful and good for skiing and fun to climb.  As a member of the “Growing up in the Midwest without My Permission” Club, I happen to think that they are just in my way.  If I want to drive through them, I have to fight all kinds of gravity to overcome them.  If I want go under them, I have to use my industrial sized drill to mine an underground…

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41 Things I’m Bitter About

41 Things I’m Bitter About

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So I heard it was your birthday…

It is again that time of year when I get to celebrate all the people asking me stupid questions like, “What are you going to do today?” and “What kind of cake do you want?” and “What presents did you get?” and “How can I annoy you the most today on the day that you want to be annoyed the least?”.   “How can I make the day that you used to look forward to be the…

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In case you missed it, because I missed doing it

In case you missed it, because I missed doing it

Cause I missed doing it.

Cause I missed doing it.

I am in an undisclosed location that absolutely does not rhyme with DUtah, under strict orders by myself to not to do work, but the Mr. Work Enforcer (me) never said anything about blogging, even though it is a lot of work.   I’m in an overground bunker that they call houses here, that has a couch that I am laying on most of the day.  This makes me bitter because of…

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Attack of the Friday Giftures

Attack of the Friday Giftures

Yeahh, no.

Yeahh, no.

Usually by Friday, I have taken all I can take.  So when I get to work I walk in like a gangster, not taking it any more.  I sit aggressively in my cubicle typing things on the keyboard way harder than I normally do.  I scowl at people that walk by way more angrily and answearanswer the phone with way more force.  It is time to get aggressive and attack, yo.  So today I’m going to be…

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The Keys to Becoming a Better Bitterer

The Keys to Becoming a Better Bitterer

Welcome back to the B.I.T.T.E.R. School of Bitterness. Professor Ben here.

Welcome back to the B.I.T.T.E.R. School of Bitterness. Professor Ben is our Bitter Lecturer of the Day.

As the internet’s number 2(because who is more bitter than someone who is only second best) leading expert in Bitterness, I have not once been asked to give a lecture or speech on how it is done.  When I figured out that people had absolutely no desire to learn the bitter trade, that is when I…

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The Bitter Divide
The Bitter Divide.
The Bitter Divide.

The Bitter Divide.

Last night I was watching the X-Men: First Class and one of the many themes of the movie was divisions and what causes them.  At first, most of the X-Men are friends because of the mutual abilities that made the different/better than regular humans with no gifts.  The world isn’t sure what to do with them, they are not sure what to do with each other, so they join factions. …

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In case you missed it…because you were busy ignoring the opening of baseball season

In case you missed it…because you were busy ignoring the opening of baseball season

Cause you were totally missing baseball.  On purpose.

Cause you were totally missing baseball. On purpose.

There was a time about 13 years ago, when there was a baseball team worth following in this town called the Mariners.  They were in the midst of taking a very specific type of steroids that caused them to be able to hit a baseball out of the the baseball park, and pitch fast enough to get even New York Yankees out.  They ended up winning a…

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Mayhemy Friday Gifitures

March is the worst.  You know the drill.  There is the weather, that really let’s be honest goes in like a lion and out like a lion.  There is your finals that you have to get ready for, unless you are not in school.  Or it is your fiscal year end at work and you have to work all kinds of crazy hours(or so I have heard).  Or you have to pretend you are Irish one day a year and wear green just so…

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Bitter Advertising Slogans
When applying for jobs, make sure you do this.

How liars dance.

 

I am a liar.  Every. Single. Day.  Every day, someone asks me how I’m doing and I almost always reply, “Good.” or “Fine.” when I should always be saying, “Bitter.  How bouch you?” to which they will probably reply, “Good.” or “Fine.” which is an even a bigger lie or ”Can’t complain.” What do you mean you can’t complain? There is always something to complain about.  If you…

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